Family’s Got Talent on the Lower Salmon

A Spontaneous Variety Show Creates Lasting Memories on a Family Rafting Trip in Idaho

I heard the first whisper while I was chopping tomatoes for salsa. I was sauteeing veggies when I heard the second whisper: Kaylin asked Nico what he was planning to perform. I was preparing cheesecake when the third clue dropped. Kelly told Leila, “Anyone can participate! It does not have to be impressive!” Then, with a meaningful eyebrow raise, she added, “There’s a reason we’re calling it a variety show, not a talent show.” Still, I didn’t fully clock what was in store. Then three little girls approached the griddle with a piece of paper and a pen.

“What’s your act?” Alyssa asked with no preamble.

“Um. Say more?” I prompted through the carnita steam.

“The variety show!” They cheered in unison.

That was when it finally dawned on me. This was happening tonight. Right now. There was going to be a variety show, right here, on the banks of Idaho’s Lower Salmon River. I turned to my cook partner, eyes wide. She laughed, “Better get planning!” 

Four days ago, four families arrived as total strangers. Having traveled from different corners of the country, they met for the first time the day before the trip. On day one, it’s common for guests to stay within their traveling groups. It’s also common for those lines to disintegrate by day three. On this trip it took even less time to start breaking down barriers. By night one, kids from all four families were sprinting down the steep sand bank and gleefully launching themselves into the river. On morning two, there was already a gaggle of cross-family kid representation in the paddle boat. By the second afternoon a large-scale sand castle construction project was in play. And on the final evening, three little girls orchestrated an entire variety show. With full participation.

Immersed in burrito preparation, I missed the set construction. The stage crew had assembled stadium seating and a makeshift stage made of three sandmats. As soon as dishes were finished, the show commenced. Annabel and Alyssa shared the emcee duties, clutching the setlist like a microphone. Jamie was the opening act: a stand-up set. At only 8-years-old, he wrote his own jokes. After running from Jamie’s relentless water gun attacks all trip, his nuanced understanding of joke construction showcased a new and wonderful side of his personality. 

Ean hid behind Dan and performed Dan’s arms in a skit titled, “Getting Ready for the Day.” Dan narrated, “Typically I start by…” Ean’s hands groped wildly around Dan’s ammo can, “touching every single thing in my ammo can.” His congenial tone belied the absurdity of Ean’s flailing limbs as he searched for Dan’s toothbrush. After touching all the bristles with his fingers, Ean managed to get toothpaste on the toothbrush before promptly missing Dan’s open mouth and instead depositing a huge glob of toothpaste directly on Dan’s cheek. Next came sunscreen. “Yeah, I usually just squirt it into the bottom of my ammo can each morning,” Dan said casually. I was barely keeping it together, but when Ean smeared the sunscreen on Dan’s face, catching the toothpaste as he went, I could barely breathe through my laughter.

Annabel secretly added her mom to the set list and announced her act, which was a wildly accurate impersonation of a squirrel. She made us all close our eyes to keep the mystery of the sound alive. Kate, a shy teenager, stunned with a vocally complex Taylor Swift medley. “Holy cow!” I whispered to Mia. Nine-year-old Nico performed a strong man performance. He honest-to-goodness did a push up with one of our guides on his back. With genuine awe, I asked Mia, “How did he do that?” Kelly helped her daughter with a skit that was truly entertaining. “Did they make that up this trip?” I asked out of the corner of my mouth. “How?” I was so impressed; I was doing a lot of incredulous whispering. 

The set list continued to expand as more and more people added their acts. Mike impressed with a recitation of “The Gettysburg Address.” Julia and her dad sang a family song that he grew up singing with his sister. Leila recited both parts of the battle of the wits scene from The Princess Bride. There was audience participation, and some of the best lines were delivered as a chorus. She lost her place only once, and Adam, who was mouthing all the words along, helped her out. 

I laughed incredibly hard. I was also inspired. The variety show was silly and goofy, but it was also a beautiful opportunity to pull the curtain back on our different sides. We watched people become fuller versions of themselves in our minds as they shared new facets of their personalities. Shy kids surprised me with their talents and humor. Boisterous and funny adults surprised me with their creative sides.

As the show was winding down, the sky lit up in a stunning sunset, a perfect cherry on top of a sweet night. Our trip leader, Georgie, closed us out with a daring and impressive dart ball performance. My heart felt so full. The show had been more than just an evening’s entertainment. It was a microcosm of human connection. Barriers dissolved. New layers revealed. Connection magnified. And all it took was one trip down a river.